Yes, I agree. This story is just starting and I can see all the different plotlines one can wander down. What an epic story. That prompt must have been as intense. I hope you go further with it. I've enjoyed it so far.
Nice! I love the juxtaposition between the first and last lines--the narrator tensing for a torture of her senses (the lack of freedom so clear) and then her walking proud and tall toward a destiny she can choose (and free). I also enjoy the addition of space and time afforded by those among the prompts that have been written as sci-fi.
Thanks for the comments Troy, it certainly transformed into a story I would like to dig further in the future. The "cult" was designed to avoid using any existing religions, but the original prompt implied more in the area of a highly patriarchal, fundamental religion... The outside world is just barely mentioned, so that is an avenue to elaborate. Let's see if I can find some time and motivation in the future to expand this.
Yes, that was the show "Unorthodox". I had watched with interest. The original prompt was generic, but described the main events, thus almost implying the main framework of the story. Glad you liked it...
The idea of the self-test booth is really cool, Levent, and I can totally see that in a movie! And I love to see another sci-fi writer in this project. (Although I haven't gotten through all the stories yet, so I'm not sure if there are more of us or not.😀)
Thanks Petra. I was an SF writer when I was 15 (bad writing, I suppose), stopped for 40+ years, picking up again now.
I’m reading the stories slowly, but I want to give them their fair credit, So it takes a bit of time. I think there will be more SF. I’m almost sure.😃😃
I agree with some of the other commenters that this has so much potential for expansion, yet it also stands alone as is so well. Chilling and harrowing, yet also hopeful and heartwarming. Great job!
The first half of the story was suspenseful and harrowing. I'm fascinated by the revelations in the end, and it got my imagination going. I want to know how her life unfolds in this new world. I really love the cult aspect of this, and can only imagine how fun a prompt this was to get!
Fascinating leaps of imagination. I’m so curious to read the original prompt, but also perfectly satisfied with admiring this on its own merits. It reminds me of a mini-series I saw a few years ago about a young woman raised in a closed part of Brooklyn, in an Orthodox Jewish community. Very strict and insular. She leaves for the “outside,” daring to start a new life away from everything and everyone she knows. As I recall, it also ends on a hopeful note. It’s called “Unorthodox,” based on a memoir.
Thanks, Julie. The original prompt was generic but described the events that would build the framework of the story. I watched Unorthodox as well, it was indeed a good series. I needed a different religion in the story, thus constructed The One and The Many.
Thanks, Victoria. Limited by 3000 words, some plotlines had to be left out. It probably needs the space for a novella. Cheers.
Yes, I agree. This story is just starting and I can see all the different plotlines one can wander down. What an epic story. That prompt must have been as intense. I hope you go further with it. I've enjoyed it so far.
Nice! I love the juxtaposition between the first and last lines--the narrator tensing for a torture of her senses (the lack of freedom so clear) and then her walking proud and tall toward a destiny she can choose (and free). I also enjoy the addition of space and time afforded by those among the prompts that have been written as sci-fi.
Thanks Holly. I probably could have done something similar with a mainframe story but SF always gives me a much wider perspective. Glad you liked it.
Thanks for the comments Troy, it certainly transformed into a story I would like to dig further in the future. The "cult" was designed to avoid using any existing religions, but the original prompt implied more in the area of a highly patriarchal, fundamental religion... The outside world is just barely mentioned, so that is an avenue to elaborate. Let's see if I can find some time and motivation in the future to expand this.
Yes, that was the show "Unorthodox". I had watched with interest. The original prompt was generic, but described the main events, thus almost implying the main framework of the story. Glad you liked it...
SF writers give their prompts such interesting lifts, take them to places others wouldn't. It's a great art.
The idea of the self-test booth is really cool, Levent, and I can totally see that in a movie! And I love to see another sci-fi writer in this project. (Although I haven't gotten through all the stories yet, so I'm not sure if there are more of us or not.😀)
Thanks Petra. I was an SF writer when I was 15 (bad writing, I suppose), stopped for 40+ years, picking up again now.
I’m reading the stories slowly, but I want to give them their fair credit, So it takes a bit of time. I think there will be more SF. I’m almost sure.😃😃
That's a very evocative storytelling. I like the hopeful hint in the end.
I agree with some of the other commenters that this has so much potential for expansion, yet it also stands alone as is so well. Chilling and harrowing, yet also hopeful and heartwarming. Great job!
The first half of the story was suspenseful and harrowing. I'm fascinated by the revelations in the end, and it got my imagination going. I want to know how her life unfolds in this new world. I really love the cult aspect of this, and can only imagine how fun a prompt this was to get!
Fascinating leaps of imagination. I’m so curious to read the original prompt, but also perfectly satisfied with admiring this on its own merits. It reminds me of a mini-series I saw a few years ago about a young woman raised in a closed part of Brooklyn, in an Orthodox Jewish community. Very strict and insular. She leaves for the “outside,” daring to start a new life away from everything and everyone she knows. As I recall, it also ends on a hopeful note. It’s called “Unorthodox,” based on a memoir.
Thanks, Julie. The original prompt was generic but described the events that would build the framework of the story. I watched Unorthodox as well, it was indeed a good series. I needed a different religion in the story, thus constructed The One and The Many.